Are you a world-class successful multitasker whose calendar is packed with 30+ tasks and meetings? Do you pride yourself on discipline and structure – 5am gym, 6am cold plunge, meeting after meeting, weekly facials and massages, followed by an active social and travel life? Do people admire you like, “Wow! How does she get so much done and look good while doing it?”

Well… congratulations! You may have a dysregulated nervous system that is incapable of relaxing and savoring life.

You can spend your entire life chasing your tail and YES, you will absolutely get a lot done and see the world. Yet wherever you go, there you are… still disconnected from within, unable to actually enjoy any of it to its fullest.

If I was to guess, you probably collapse once in a while. You feel sad or lonely when you slow down. You get anxious when there is a gap in your calendar, so you fill it with massage, yoga, social event, etc. The moment you feel slightly rested, you find something else to do. And before you even complete one task, your mind has already moved on to the next one – big or small. 

In many of my blogs I talk about our conditioning from early childhood. How we felt loved and praised for being good, productive and helpful, while love was withdrawn – or worse, we were punished – for simply being kids. As adults, this can show up as overachievement, productivity, hyper-discipline and perfectionism because love became something we learned to earn. And when a child feels unloved, she can never fully feel safe in her body.

So your unconscious programming keeps you moving to feel validated and seen, to prove to the world that you are good and worthy of love. But that is a losing battle. No amount of external validation will ever fill the gap from within, nor will you ever feel enough by doing more.

Years move fast. And even though you’ve done so much, how much of the last year can you actually remember? How many moments have you truly lost yourself enjoying?

To enjoy life, you need to involve your senses in the present moment – touch, smell, taste, sight and hearing. You have to actually be in your body. If your mind has already moved on to the next task, your attention has left the experience. You are on autopilot, technically completing life while eternally chasing your tail and waiting for retirement to finally enjoy it. If you don’t learn to live now, retirement will feel like a life sentence not fun.

Life happens now.

Fulfillment doesn’t come from getting more done. It comes from doing less MINDFULLY. It comes from working with your body’s intelligence so you can actually enjoy what you are doing instead of being driven by the cerebral machine you proudly call “INTELLECT” that’s mostly wired for survival. 

Mindful living doesn’t mean sacrificing your standards, ambition or finances. It means actually being present for the life you worked so hard to create.

So tomorrow, when you wake up to your habitual routine of coffee, gym, quick shower and breakfast to go, catch yourself each moment and turn it into a mindful one. SIT down and smell your coffee first… FEEL your skin wake up from the fresh smell… ALLOW your nostrils to be ticked by the gentle steam of your freshly brewed elixir… then take a little sip of it… and really savor the taste with your taste buds. And when in shower, set an intention to feel cleaned not just physically but also energetically, allowing the water to wash down everything and anything that is no longer serving you, replenishing you with fresh energy… really feel the water pressure brushing through your hair, warming up your shoulders and feel the gliding soap over your body smelling the fresh aroma of your body wash and watching the intricate design of how the water flows down your skin… 

Before you object… I understand it’s a stretch to ask a Ferrari to slow down to the speed of a stagecoach so it can smell the roses. But maybe start with one mindful moment a day.

When you catch yourself wiping the counter quickly while mentally making dinner, pause. Take one intentional breath and move your hand more slowly and intentionally. When you catch yourself racing through the grocery store, pause. Pick up a piece of fresh fruit and take a good whiff of it. Notice its color, texture and nature’s intricate creation.

Do – or don’t do, just be – one thing every day that brings you genuine joy. Leave a little gap between meetings to simply sit and exist. Take a beat. Check in with your body. The compounded interest may be worth the investment.

These intentional moments add up. Eventually, they create a life so deeply fulfilling that you no longer want to rush through it.

And be patient with yourself. It took you decades to work your way up to being a Ferrari. It might take a minute to learn the pace of a stagecoach.

Give yourself grace. And keep on creating the fulfilling life you’ve worked so hard to build.

Yours in living with intention.

Ava