Healing isn’t linear. It moves in spirals — layer by layer, breath by breath. You revisit familiar patterns again and again until the charge begins to soften. The characters may change. The circumstances shift. But the emotion underneath stays the same… until one day, it doesn’t.

That’s when you know something has transformed. When the trigger no longer stings. When you feel peace where there was once pain. When the same story no longer matches your vibration. That is healing in motion.

But transformation is not a quick fix. It’s a sacred, unfolding process. From awareness to integration, each stage brings you closer to your truth.

Whether you are healing trauma, loss, heartbreak, or simply seeking more presence in your life, this spiral becomes your return — to yourself.

1. Awareness: Cultivating the Observer

Healing begins when you start to notice.

Maybe it’s a tightness in your chest. A thought that plays on repeat. Or a pattern in your relationships that feels all too familiar. Awareness is the moment you pause and say, “Something here needs my attention.”

Looking back, you begin to see the common denominator in the stories that keep replaying. Through breathwork, journaling, or simply stillness, you begin to witness the beliefs and behaviors that no longer serve you.

2. Embracing Your Shadow: Feeling What You’ve Avoided

This is where many turn away. But it’s also where deep healing begins.

As awareness deepens, emotions that were tucked away begin to surface — shame, guilt, grief, anger, sadness. Sometimes depression. Often discomfort. The mind might start to question your worth. Judgment creeps in. Doubt follows.

But these are not signs of failure. They’re signs you’re finally safe enough to feel what’s been buried.

Carl Jung called this process “meeting the shadow.” These parts of you aren’t broken — they’ve simply been waiting to be welcomed. The key isn’t to fix them. It’s to allow them to move, speak, and soften. You do that with gentleness, grace, and compassion.

3. Self‑Compassion: Replacing Judgment with Grace

After the shadow comes the shame. That voice that whispers, “You should know better.” “You’re too much.” “You mo not enough.”

This is where self-compassion becomes a healing balm. According to Dr. Kristin Neff, self-compassion soothes the nervous system, lowers stress hormones, and creates space for real emotional change.

You cultivate a new voice, learn to speak to yourself differently. With warmth. With understanding. You begin to believe, “I’m allowed to be human. I am worthy of love despite my mistakes. This is what healing looks like.” 

In this space, pain becomes possibility.

4. Forgiveness: Setting Yourself Free

You slowly start forgiving yourself for your past mistakes, which then trickles into forgiving others. Forgiveness isn’t about excusing the hurt. It’s about releasing the hold it has on your body, your mind, and your heart.

Whether it’s forgiving yourself or another, this stage cannot be forced. It’s layered. Sometimes it arrives in a wave. Other times, it trickles in over time. You might forgive, only to feel resentment rise again. That’s normal. Healing is circular.

Each time you return with the intention to forgive, you shed another layer. And in doing so, you make room for something new. A deeper peace. A softer truth. Forgiveness sets you free — not all at once, but one breath at a time.

5. Reconnecting with the Inner Child: Remembering Joy

Healing is incomplete without returning to the child within.

It’s the child who holds the grief. The unmet needs. The original wound. And it’s the child who holds the key to joy, wonder, and aliveness.

This stage is about reparenting — becoming the presence you always needed. Connecting with your younger self. When triggers arise, placing a hand on your heart and whispering, “You’re safe now.” Engaging in play, creativity, or simple rituals that remind you of who you were before the world told you who to be.

When the inner child feels seen, something beautiful unlocks. Joy returns.

6. Letting Go of the Old Self: Releasing Survival Patterns

There comes a moment when the old masks — the achiever, the fixer, the people-pleaser — begin to feel too tight.

You’ve outgrown the roles you once wore for protection. The identities that were necessary for survival are no longer needed for expansion. This stage feels like the death of you. And in many ways, it is. The death of the version of you who did what s/he had to do to survive.

You don’t shame these parts. You thank them, then you begin to release them. Letting go isn’t a loss — it’s an opening. A clearing. A becoming. This is what transformation requires. 

7. Gratitude and Presence: Living in the Now

As space opens within you, presence begins to settle in.

You find joy in the ordinary. The warmth of tea in your hands. A smile from a stranger. A moment of silence between thoughts. You’re no longer rushing toward some imagined future. You’re here. Now. And it’s enough.

Gratitude anchors you in this moment. It doesn’t have to be practiced or performed. It arises naturally when your nervous system softens and your heart feels safe.

Life becomes sacred again. Pace becomes baseline.

8. Becoming Love: The Final Integration

This isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being real.

You’ve held your pain. Reclaimed your joy. Softened your edges. And somewhere along the way, you stopped striving and started simply being. Being love. Not as an idea, but as your lived expression.

You listen differently. You move with intention. You live in alignment — not in performance. You start to create from a place of wholeness and inspiration.

This is the embodiment of healing. The homecoming. The moment you realize you already are what you’ve been searching for.

You’ll move through these stages more than once. Sometimes in a single day. Healing is not linear — it’s seasonal, cyclical, and sacred.

There’s no rush. No race. No finish line.

Honor your timing. Honor your body. Keep returning to presence. With each spiral through, you deepen your relationship with self. And that is the ultimate healing.

You’re not broken. You’re becoming.

Yours in healing,

 ~ Ava ~